Learn to Say 'No, But...'
Posted on Monday, May 28, 2007 At
7:23 AM
The people around us – colleagues, friends and family – can all be a drain on our time. It’s easy to get drawn into tasks that we really don’t want to be doing.
It is okey to say ‘no’ when you have a good reason for doing so – even if it’s your boss who wants you to do something. Perhaps you’ve got an important event planned or you’re too tired or you don’t think it’s something you should be doing.
However, saying ‘no’ isn’t terribly helpful to whoever is asking for your time. Think about it from their perspective – they are trying to get something done.
To soften the blow of refusal, think through the following questions:
It is okey to say ‘no’ when you have a good reason for doing so – even if it’s your boss who wants you to do something. Perhaps you’ve got an important event planned or you’re too tired or you don’t think it’s something you should be doing.
However, saying ‘no’ isn’t terribly helpful to whoever is asking for your time. Think about it from their perspective – they are trying to get something done.
To soften the blow of refusal, think through the following questions:
- Are you willing to make any concessions at all? For example, you might not be willing to work late today, but you might be willing to come in early on another day. Or you don’t want to join the committee on an ongoing basis, but you’re willing to give some informal advice to one of the committee members. So, you might say, ‘no, but instead I could...’
- Who else might be able to help? Has anyone else got the right skills, experience or availability to do it? In effect, you’re saying ‘no, but I know someone else who might be able to help...’